Argh! Anuther Foster Dawg!

Well good gravee I am beginning to thinks that Mummy has sum sort of brane problem! No sooner does she sware off fostering cause of all her werk then she brings home this sorry lookin thang.

It is a gurl baby dawg that smells awfull jest like Dubby smelld awfull. Thats rite this dawg has The Manje!! Dont wurry it is the kind of manje that me and Star cannot get called demodeks.

Rosie wich iz this baby dawg iz obveeusly not all bawld like Dubby wuz but she iz way more skratchee. She skratches all the time and she haz to take lots and lots of medisin.

Mummy sez this is jest fer a very short wile cause Rosie iz a dawg wut iz called a Bawstun Terryer and unlike us pit bull dawgs they iz not reel commun in reskue howses and there iz a wating list fer reskue Bawstun Terryers. So Rosie will be gawn soon before she kin take away Mummys hart.

In uther nooz I have jest started takin alerjee shots!

I have so menny alerjees that I must take two shots at a time. But dont wurry it duznt hert.

I wuz a little bit nurvus at furst.

Daddy gived me the shot! Mummy wuz too skeered to do it.

Dun alreddy?? Well that wuznt so bad!

OK well Mummy sez she haves to go hurry bak to wurk so I gess that is all frum me fer a wile. But dont wurry I will makes Mummy halp me with my blog soon cause it is my burthday very very soon!!

Pee Ess Happy Turkey Day everybuddy!!

Paw It Forward

Well a wile ago my pal Quizz had a Paw It Forward game. The roolz of this are very eazy.

1. Get a present frum sumone fer Paw It Forward.
2. Post about it on yer blog.
3. The furst three peeple or dawgs or wutever who reply to yer Paw It Forward blog post will git a present frum you. It kin be ennythang and doesnt have to be fancy.
4. Those three peeple or dawgs have to start at number wun.

Now Quizz made a donashun to halp aminals insted of sending me a present and I think that is reel nice. So I am gonna do the same thang!

The furst three peeples or dawgs or wutever who reply to this post will git to choose a place to where Mummy will send munny wurth about $100 each.

There is only two condishuns wich is that yer place must be a place wut is called a Nonprofit, and also that place cannot hate pit bull dawgs like me. But it does not have to be aminal nonprofit it kin be enny kind!

You mite be saying wow $100 times 3 is a billyun gazillyun munnys! Dozer I wuz thinked that yer Mummy wuz broke cause of you and yer vet bills!

Well yes it is troo Mummy is very very broke and I am seeing less treets these days. However she makes a little bit of munny frum her Store and she saves the munny in a speshul place and duz not spend it on ennythang eksept to run her website.

She has a little bit of munny left overs this yeer after paying all her website bills and she sed I should use it fer sumthang good. I tolled her hey Mummy treets are good!! But I dont think she wuz lisening.

Its ok Mummy I still luv you. Here let me halp you fold these blankies.

You may have notissed Mummy is not reely halping me with my blog too much. That is cause she iz started a new job that meens she goes away all day. This is not new fer me cause Mummy used to werk all the times it is only in the last I dunno yeer plus a half that she has bin at home and you will notiss that my blog has only bin going fer a yeer plus a few munths and that is cause she wuz not werking all day.

Now she is away all day and then wen she comes home she does not pay atenshun to me kin you beleeve it?? No she does thangs like werk sum more or sleep or eat peeple foodies or she leeves the howse agin to go sumwhere called a meeting. And of corse as you all knows Daddy is never home cause he werks all day and sumtimes all nite too.

So does you know wut that meens? I am stuck at home alone all day long with my only companyun wich is my EVEL ROOMATE STAR!! NOOOOOOES!!!!

Whatever. You know you love me.

Farewell, Dubby!

Well folks Dubby did not come home today. Mummy sez he getted adopted!

Fer sum reeson she is very sad.

I am bizzy judjing Daisys costoom contest and I dont have time to be sad. Not that I would be sad ennyways haha! I am reely happy cause it is so kwiet around here AT LAST!!

So here it is yer very last pitcher ever of Dubby. So long Dubby! Mebbe I didnt reely like you but I shore hope you have a nice life with a nice familee!!

Mummy, Dubby, and Auntie K

Good Riddance I Mean Goodbye Waylan

Well yesterday wuz the last day fer the cold air masheen peeple to be here. So it wuz also the last day that Waylan will be here. Yes!! I can go back to having Mummy all to myself at last.

It terned out that Waylan wuz an eskape artist. I dont know why he wuz called an artist when he did not paint anythang or skulpt anythang but nevertheless I am jest repeeting wut Mummy sed.

Part of the problem I gess wuz the new green fence wut Mummy and Daddy put up a few days ago. This green fence is made of plastik and it is pretty week. But Mummy sez it wuz fer to keep the stoopid chikens out of the konstrukshun zone not to keep the dawgs in the yard. That is cause I am a Very Good Dawg and I do not never leeve the yard and okay I gess Star is also a Good Dawg cause she does not run off neither.

But Waylan is still a baby dawg and he did not unnerstand that he wuz not sposed to go unner the fence.

Wun of the rare moments when Waylan wuz not plotting eskape.

"I could make it under here... but SHE's watching me..."

Waylan also figgered out how to git under the howse and come out on the other side wich wuz also on the other side of the fence. So Mummy tryed to be smarter than Waylan and block the hole he wuz crawling thru.

"What the hey-ho? Where's my escape hole??"

Waylan proved himself smarter than Mummy tho cause he kept getting out no matter wut she did.

I wuz a Very Good Dawg the whole time. I jest wated pashently fer anywun at all to come throw my ball.

Here I am here I am here I am!!!

Oh! Theres sumone!!

I... hey... where is you going?!?

Star and Waylan also played like crazy maniaks for a long time until they wuz both reely tired.

Can't... breathe... too much... playing...

Aw, I love you too, Waylan! Even if you are, like, 20 human years younger than me.

*Missing him already*

"Dang, creepy camera lady is still watching me."

Wut does it take to git a ball throwed around here?!?

Tabloid Skandal!!

Well hot on the heels of my viktory in the Tricks fer Treats contest the paparazi are all over me like flys on stiky paper.

Okay well mebbe it is jest one paparazi and she looks suspishusly like Mummy but look at this the paparazi is alreddy taking skandalus pitchers of me oh noes!!

Look at this pitcher wich suposedly shows me and Star holding paws.

It wuz an aksident!! I sware!!! Star jest had to stretch out her paws rite when the pitcher got taken.

And wut about this one here wich alejedly shows us sleeping togethers:

Well folks this one wuz a SETUP!! And nether one of us is sleeping so there!!

I shore hope my luv Daisy does not get mad. Gosh fame jest isnt the treets and munny I wuz hoping it would be.

We Are Not In Love

Well good gravy I leeve my blog alone fer like wut a few days and Star is spreding crazy rumers about us. No sir this will not stand.

Let me make it cleer I am not in luv with the evil Star. I think it is obveeus to everybuddy wut knows me that I find Stars posishun on thangs like stuffy destrukshun and treet disperzal and frendliness to dawgs to be irreconsilabull with my own posishuns on those matters.

We have a difrence in opinyun regarding stuffy destrukshun.

My disgust with other dawgs is not compattibull with Stars disgusting LUV fer other dawgs.

Our relashunship would never last. I thinks only Star is obliviuss to this fakt.

Besides I alreddy have Daisy who is the bestest dawg ever cause she looks jest like me and I am awesum so Daisy must be jest as awesum and possibly awesummer cause she can write blogs a bit better than me. Also I have never meeted Daisy so it werks out grate since I am not a big fan of dawgs that I meet.

Okay so I hope that cleers thangs up a bit. I am gonna have to figger out how to keep Star offa my blog sheesh.

We Are In Love

Hello everyone. Today is a serious topic. It is about love. Since Dozer is rather stupid about love, I am going to talk about it. To be specific, I want to tell everyone that Dozer and I are in love!

Yes, I have heard that Dozer asked Daisy to be his Valentine. Well, it looks like Daisy and I might be rivals! And I won’t give up easy. Besides, look how close I am to Dozer.

That’s right, my love for Dozer is something only free treats can get in the way of!!

As it turns out, there were no free treats in the kitchen after all, but I’m sure it was an innocent mistake.

A Year Ago

Well my pal Trooper tagged me to tell about wut I wuz doing a year ago today. I dont think I can tell you wut I wuz doing back then but I can tell you wut I wuz NOT doing.

I wuz not getting any atenshun or luv. I wuz not going on any walks. I wuz not playing fetch. And do you know why???

Well part of it wuz cause it wuz reely wet outsides that year and it wuz too muddy to play outsides. And also part of it wuz cause Old Lady Dawg wuz very sick and Mummy wuz spending lots and lots of time with her. In fact I think Old Lady Dawg misteriously disapeared just a tiny bit less than a year ago and I wuz even more bored after that cause I reely liked Old Lady Dawg.

Anyways what a sad story! Here is a pitcher of me and Old Lady Dawg to make up fer the sad story. Although I guess the pitcher is kinda sad too cause this is the last pitcher ever of Old Lady Dawg. Sorry bout that.

Me and Old Lady Dawg in Febuary 2008

Okay now I have to tag some other dawg pals so I am tagging Daisy the dog, Dannan the dog, and Dobby the dog! I would also tag Dennis the dog but I thinks he has already done this. If not, Dennis, go fer it.

Honestee is the Bestest Policee

Well my pal Dennis gived me this thang which is a meem and a pitcher. Here is the pitcher part:

And the meem part sez I must tell ten honest thangs bout myself. As I menshuned to Dennis this is why I did not allow Star to have this responsibilitee. Star is a known lier after pretending to be a stuffee surjen and also faking her own deth among other thangs.

Here is ten honest thangs bout myself:

1. I dont like leaving my house never. Its scary out there in that big wurld!
2. Once I thinked I wuz a tiny baby dawg and I tried to fit my hed through some stare railings and it did not fit! I wuz shocked and confoosed and Mummy had to reskue me.
3. Fer sum reeson big birds does not likes me. My Mummys duck wuz mean to me all the times and now my Mummys chiken pecks me in the eye. I run away! Birds are icky.
4. I luv the sun so much I am prolly part kitty.
5. I have only eskaped my yard one time when I was a little dawg. I ran down to the corner and then camed right back in just a few sekunds. Mummy wuz so unhappy and I never did it again. Course that mite be cause Mummy never lets me go outsides by myself anymore. Where is the trust Mummy sheesh??
6. I like to do flips when I am playing fetch. I am not very good at catching thangs when I flip. But I still do it cause it makes me look awesome.
7. I decided I didnt like popcorn a loooong time ago but Mummy still hasnt caught on and she keeps giving it to me as a treat. Bleah.
8. When I am bored I lick my feet until Mummy sez oh gross Dozer please stop licking it sounds so wet and nasty. Yes Mummy it is wet and nasty but whats a guy gotta do round here fer sum atenshun??
9. Mummy sez my brain is prolly the size of a walnut even tho my hed is the size of a watermellen. I dunno if thats true though so mebbe this doesnt count as an honest thang?
10. I only jumped on the cowch one time in my whole life and it wuz to eskape the terible vacum cleener of deth!! Since then I have been very carefull not to be trapped in the living room when Mummy brings out the vacum.

Whew that wuz reely very hard! Now I have to pick seven dawgs or mebbe peeples to do this meem. I am gonna pick:

1. Daisy the pit bull who honestlee looks like me and tells it like it is bout Milk Bones
2. Bobo and Meja who are honest bout the fact that they is not puppys but that does not stop peeple frum calling them puppys
3. Daisy the curly cat who is always always honest and good
4. Dannan who recently impursenated Sooperman and I am not shore if that wuz honest but dang it wuz funny
5. Quizz whose Mummy is an honest peeple
6. Mina or Celeste tho I am betting Mina will want to do this fer the same reeson I didnt let Star do this
7. Gus or Waldo or their Dog Mom whoever is most honest but no fighting to the deth to decide on that ha ha!

Okay now I guess I better get started licking my feet so I can get sum luvvin frum Mummy!

Pathetik face attack! You are helpless against it!

Werk Schmerk

Well honestlee what is this thang called werk and why does everybuddy do it so much? It is cutting into my luvvin time. I have had to strategikally place myself so that I cannot be ignored ennymore.

The fee to reach this desk is five treets and a kissy.

Mummy sez oh Dozer you are in my way. Well duh!! Isnt that the point?