Kyute Overlode!!

Well jest a warning before you git to the pitchers that these mite be waaaay too kyute fer sum viewers. If you are very sensitive to kyute pleeze leeve the blog now!! This post is so kyute it crashed my blog three times!!

Now seeing as how I am the judje for Most Kyute Costoom in Daisys Costoom Contest I feeled that I should reashure sum of you who mite be thinking hey Dozer you is nine yeers old! You is an old old dawg and you is grumpy and you does not even like other dawgs fer that matter. Wut makes you kwalified fer this very challenjing job??

Okay that is a very fare kweshun!

Furst I have been persunally certifyed kyute since I wuz a little baby dawg. Jest look at this evidense!

Baby dawg Dozer!!

Oh so kyute baby dawg Dozer! With bonus Old Lady Dawg!

So kyute you jest wanna cuddle me!!

Even kyute in outer space ware no wun kin heer you say Awwww!!

Sekund I am a very good judje of other dawgs kyuteness or lack thereuv!

Toy steeling bed hogging foster dawg Mack wuz not kyute.

Daddys luv steeling bed hogging foster dawg Puppy wuz not kyute.

Foster dawg Elvis wuz not kyute and no bow tye kin ever change that!

Foster dawg Duke wuz jest plane uglee.

Foster dawg Lucy aka Kween of Drool mite have bin a little kyute but that wuz all she had goin fer her.

And well we all knows Titan wuz the foster dawg frum Hell and I dont think kyute dawgs come frum Hell.

Even I am not at my kyutest here. I look skary but reely I am jest sneezing!!

Oh look its me rite after the sneeze and gosh I am sooo kyute!

And of corse theres the loverly Daisy plus sum Kongs! Very kyute!!

Well hopefully that reshures sum peeple that I reely does know wut is kyute and wut is not!

I am shore there are still detraktors out there so I will proves myself a good judje of kyute wunce and fer all.

WARNING — VERY VERY KYUTE — WARNING

Pleeze view this pitcher on a empty stomak cause it is soooo sickeningly kyute you mite throwed up!!

Ding Dong the Dawg is Gone

Well todays Mummy left the house with Evil Dawg Titan and she did not bring him back. She tolled me he wuz adopted! She sed he has gone to live at a nice house with a big family and two other dawgs. I feel sorry for them other dawgs!!

But I shore hope it works out cause gosh its super to have all my toys back. Except my lion toy which sadly Titan destroyed and Mummy throwed it away.

I think today is possibly even more better than yesterday.

Now thangs are gonna quiet down a bit so I can get back to my regular rooteen of blogging and sleeping.

Scandal!

Well some videos have surfaced on the Interweb that purport to show me playing (gasp gasp!!) with that Evil Dawg Titan. I say preposterus! Lets view these allejed videos now.

Well I does not play bow to no dawg never! So that must not be me it must be some other dawg.

And what is this video?

That dawg look like me?? Preposterus I say! Ick and look how they are hanging on each other.

I cant beleeve anyone would think that dawg looks like me.

Oh I am going to be sickies.

Where is the Luv?

Well it has been a little whiles since I posted and it is mostly cause Mummy is not letting me on the compooter.

This is mostly that awful dawg Titans fault cause he takes up all her time. Why jest yesterday who wuz it that wuz gone fer hours and hours and came home smelling like car and pet store and park? Not me thats fer shore. No I wuz home enjoying a nap fer those hours and hours and I wuz kinda glad Titan wuz gone but not glad that Mummy wuz gone. Cause when she is gone she cant luv me.

So when Mummy gets home I make shore she luvs me as much as possible. I help her akomplish this by walking in front of her and blocking her path no matter where she goes. I bring her toys while she is visiting the people potty place and I put my head on her hands when she is typeing. And when she is getting a bathies I sit on the rug outside the bathies place and rub my furs on her when she gets out and is still wet. She also apresheeates my head in her lap when she is eating foodies espeshially when I drools a bit on her pants. Also I reach out and touch my Mummy with my paw by standing on her foot while she is opening the door so I can go outsides and then I launch off her foot to run outsides. This makes her scream and shout and though she is holding her foot I know she is reely shouting fer joy cause she luvs me sooo much.

Yes my Mummy cant help but luv me cause we are so close like two pees in a pod. That awful dawg Titan is trying to make it like three pees in a pod with him in the middle!

Speaking of pee I did exakt revenge on Titan the Evil Dawg at long last and made it seem very aksidental. Yes I tricked him into putting his head under my leg and then I peed on his head.

Mummy wuz not too pleased but she wuz not mad at me fer doing it. No she wuz mad at Titan fer sticking his head where it dont belong.

Ah, Qwiet At Last

Well today Titan the Evil Dawg left. Mummy drived him away somewheres and when she came back he wuz not with her.

I wuz reely hoping that she drived him into the kuntry and left him there but she sed no Titan is jest getting nootered today.

So I am jest gonna enjoy this nice qwiet day while it lasts. I am having nice dreams of Titan getting his booty kicked by a big dawg at the vet place.

You cant see it too good but my tongue is sticking out while Im sleeping!

Good v. Evil

Well I knows that wen I wuz last telling you bout the terrible foster dawg what has come to stay with us fer a while I sed he wuz evil and bad and awful. And that is all true but Mummy sez if I want that dawg to go to a new home I must lern to talk about him in a nice way so people will luvs him and want to keeps him fer themselves.

Geeze youre making a mess Titan.

So I am going to talk about this dawgs redeeming kwalitees.

This dawgs name is Titan. His name is a redeeming kwalitee. Mummy sez Titans wuz gods of old times so I reckon Titan is a powerful dawg what can grant you wishes and stuff. He has not granted me any wishes but perhaps that is cause I wish he would drop dead ha ha just kidding no seriously I do.

Also if you recall I wuz gonna have to be a Very Bad Dawg to remind Mummy and Daddy of the reesons why they does not want to get another dawg. But this wuz causing me sum sadness cause I likes to be a Very Good Dawg and I wuz not too shore how to be Bad.

Well Titan has solved this problem fer me compleetlee cause he is an Extraordinarilee Bad Dawg and he is doing a great job of making Mummy and Daddy crazy. Mummy sez it is cause he is a cattle dawg and wants to work and exercise and even worse hes a puppy and untrained too so he is a whirlwind of terror that rampages through our howse except when he is sleeping. But I sez that is nonsense cause an Evil Dawg could also be a whirlwind of terror and if you follow Occams Razor then that is the logical conclushun not all Mummys theorys about whatever she wuz saying.

I would so bite you if this wuznt in my mouth.

What is more is that when Titan and me are compared then not only does Titan look like a Very Bad Dawg but I looks like an Absolutely Perfect Dawg in every way. So way to go Titan fer making Mummy and Daddy luv me that much more!

Mummy sez I have entirely missed the point about telling about Titans good kwalitees. But I am pretty shore I didnt leave any out so I am not shore wut else Mummy expekts me to say.