Reel Eggs

Well today I lerned sumthang noo and so did Mummy.

I lerned that sumtimes an egg is not reely an egg. And Mummy lerned that I will eat ennythang wut looks like an egg.

Here I wuz jest enjoying a nice fine day outsides wile Mummy cleened the chikkin howse and Star did wutever dum thang Star does.

Ah wut a loverly day.

And then JAKPOT! I finded sum yummy yummy chikkin eggs on the grownd!!

Mummy sez Wut iz you doing over thar Dozer? in 3... 2... 1...

Natcherally its finders keepers round these parts so I finded and I keeped these delishuss eggs!

That is until Mummy sed hay wate a sekund ware are those fake eggs frum the chikkin howse?!?

She did not beleeve me wen I sed oh hay Mummy I jest finded them like this.

Mebbe there are sum bigger holes on the uther side. Mebbe not. I aint sayin.

I meen everybuddy noes baby chikkins come out of the eggs throo them little holes. Dont aks me ware them baby chikkins is. That is a mistery of life!

Now being a dawg I cannot reed but I did aks them chikkins wut is writed on the eggs.

WELL!!! If they sez REEL EGG on them wut wuz I sposed to think they wuz?!?

I am purty shore I have a very good lawsoot here cause that is called Falls Advertizing!!!

Dozer, you dummy, they didn't even smell like real eggs.


Hoppy Easter!

Well hi everybuddy I jest wanted to wish yall a hoppy Easter!

We is having nice weather here and this is wut I have bin up to. It is not very eksiting at all!

You kin hear burds skweeking in the bakgrownd of this moovee. Those burds is called grackles and they is very very noisy!! And here in Teksus they is everyware!

I hopes you is all having sum nice wether but if you is not hay move to Teksus!

But only fer this munth. You will not like it nekst munth. It will be hot and awful!

Hoppy Easter frum yer pals Dozer and Star and all them chikkens!!

NOOO!!! SNOW!!! Plus sum pitchers frum the 2004 snow!

Well folks yesterday wuz a teribull day fer me cause we had SNOW! This is the furst time in a zillion yeers that we have had snow. Mummy camed home frum werk early yesterday and she werked at home cause of the snow. She sez that that is cause in Teksus nobuddy knows how to drive in snow.

It wuz the furst time Star and Sweet Pea had ever seed snow before.

OMG YUM!!! Oh no wait a second what are you giving me?

 I have seed snow before so this is my sekund time seeing it and I do not think it is a big deel.

Ppftht I duz not like snow.

But yes we had to stand around and hyumur Mummy wile she taked pitchers and throwed balls of snow at us. I did not chase the snow cause I knowed it wuz not a reel ball. But Star who is very very stoopid chased the snowball every singul time hahahaha!!!

After a wile the snow started going away. That is cause this is Teksus.

Then at long last Mummy sed we must go insides cause everythang wuz gettin all wet and muddy.

My favrite part of the day wuz this part.

Space heeter fer the win!!!

Now here is a very very speshul treet fer you. It is sum old pitchers of the last time it snowed here in Teksus where I live!!!

Mummy sez this day wuz called Febuary 14 2004 so I wuz only three yeers old! This is the furst time I ever seed snow. It wuz in the middul of the nite and all the naybors wuz outsides playing in the snow fer sum crazy reesun.

I tryed to eskape the snow by jumping out of it but I could not git out of it!

Then I tryed to eskape by running away but I could not run away ether!

Old Lady Dawg jest stood there and did not move.

Interestingly Mummy and Daddy had bringed home a foster baby dawg this time wen it snowed too.

Foster baby dawg Puppy also seed snow fer the furst time.

I tasted the snow a little bit and it wuz cold and yukky.

You kin see in these pitchers that there wuz green grass everywheres under the snow. That is cause it wuz nice warm Teksus wether before it snowed and we thinked it wuz gonna be spring time soon! Also this snow melted away jest as fast as yesterdays snow. It wuz gone by the next day.

Yep we dont git snow very ofen but wen we do it shore is a BIG DEEL!

Happy Valintimes Day!

Well hi everybuddy its that very nice Day of Luv also nown as Valintimes Day! This is wen you is sposed to give flowers and chocolit to yer sweethart and tell them you luv them.

I have alreddy gived a big kissy to my Mummy. I did not give her flowers cause Daddy did that and I did not give her chocolit cause she has buyed plenty of chocolit fer herself not jest fer today but every time she goes to the store!

Daisy is my gurlfrend and I thinks her present will be late but in the meentimes here is a pitcher of sum flowers jest fer her! I hopes she will still be my gurlfrend this yeer and she will not find a yunger dawg!

Hey Daisy Happy Valintimes Day!!

I hopes everybuddy has a nice Valintimes Day with their sweethart or with their familys or even jest with their dawgs and or kittys!!

Hey Star does you have ennythang you want to add? Star??

Ummm okay I am not shore wut you guys is doin over there but dont let me git in yer way! Heheheh. No seeriusly stay away frum me.

The Day of Luv is Coming Up!

Well hi everybuddy its bin a wile sorry bout that but Mummy is still bizzy as a bee mmmm bees…

Sinse my full recuvuree frum surguree I am not playing too much but I git lots of sleep! Look here I am in my favrite chare! With my evel roommate who is like my shadow I cannot git rid of her.

Yes there arent too menny pitchers of me lately cause all I do is sleep sleep sleep and Mummy sez its cause I am an old dawg. Hey Mummy I am not old I am jest youthfully challenjed!!

Here is anuther pitcher of me looking goofy. Mummy kept saying treet treet treet over and over and that always makes me happy doesnt it make you happy too?!?!

Yes yes treet I heered you the furst time Mummy!

And lookit this other thang wut has happened recently. Mummy has LOOSED HER MIND I TELLS YA!!!

Its a rat... its a deer... OMG NO ITS A FOSTER DAWG ARRRGGH!!!!

Closeup of hideus uglee foster baby dawg

Yes jest wen I thinked thangs wuz going good Mummy bringed home ANUTHER mangey stinky uglee thang. This time it is a gurl baby dawg and at furst it wuz very sick and I was ok with that cause it jest sleeped all the time. But now it is feeling BETTER wich is BAD cause now all it wants to do is play play play. Me and Star are sposed to be reel nice to it but that is very hard wen it is eating all my toys up!

It is called Sweet Pea but I thinks its reel name is Evel Pea!!

Anyways Mummy sez that Day of Luv is coming up called Valintimes Day!! I am happy cause it makes me think of my gurlfrend Daisy and I am gonna git her a purty gift. I wunder wut I should git her?? Cause dawgs cannot eat choclet!

Hay Star who is you gonna give yer luv fer Valintimes Day?? Star??

WAHAHAHAAH!! Oh man Star git a room!!!

Happy Noo Yeer and My Semi Retyrmint

Well hi folks geeze its bin a wile and Daddy finally tolled Mummy hey Mummy you need to halp Dozer with his blog or folks is gonna think he dyed or sumthang.

Ha ha well no I didnt dye my furs is still nice and wite. But there haz bin lots and lots of trips to the v-e-t.

Furst there wuz a noo staff infekshun. You kno they jest dont make staffs the way they yused to! I fired the last staff and I hads to fire this wun too.

Then wile my staff wuz packing up there desks I getted sumthang even wurse. HIVES!! I getted hives everyware. However there wuz no bees living in these hives. Wich wuz a good thang cause Mummy would not pet me if I had bees on me.

Staff infekshun plus hives ekwals itchy itchy itchy

Staff infekshun plus hives ekwals sad Dozer.

Then I gess that operashun way back in Joon wuz not good enuff fer Mummy cause wun day rite before the day Crismus wich I luv cause I gets lots of treets we went to a speshul v-e-t that I hads never bin to before and then I woke up and look wut happened!!

I wuz literaly in stiches!

I wuz literaly in stiches!

Yes folks I had surjery AGIN!! It is cause I had sumthang called a meniskus tare. Also I had a lump on my sholder there and you kin see it wuz stolen wile I wuz having this surjery to fix my meniskus!

Mummy sez the surjery is my Crismus present and I getted the most ekspensive present of everybuddy so I shuld feel reel lucky. All I gots to say bout that is wut present?? The v-e-t took my meniskus and my lump and he even taked a plate wut wuz in my leg from the last surjery and all I getted wuz sum lousy stiches and anuther coupul weeks waring a Cone!!!

And bein stuk in the howse with Star. Ugh.

And bein stuk in the howse with Star. Ugh.

The v-e-t has tolled Mummy that even tho I have had these surjerys on my leggy I mite hurt my leggy agin if I am not carefull. Well everybuddy knows I am Very Good but never carefull! I am not even shore wut that wurd meens.

But Mummy sez it meens I am not allowed to play ball outsides or play ruff with my toys very much ennymore. She sez I am too old and I gotta slow down.

So I am gonna semi-retyre my blog and give Mummy a little brake. However I am wishing she will not have a job fer too long so she will git back to my blog soon.

Now here is a happy wish fer you wich is

Happy Noo Yeer!!

frum yer pals Dozer and Star

Argh! Anuther Foster Dawg!

Well good gravee I am beginning to thinks that Mummy has sum sort of brane problem! No sooner does she sware off fostering cause of all her werk then she brings home this sorry lookin thang.

It is a gurl baby dawg that smells awfull jest like Dubby smelld awfull. Thats rite this dawg has The Manje!! Dont wurry it is the kind of manje that me and Star cannot get called demodeks.

Rosie wich iz this baby dawg iz obveeusly not all bawld like Dubby wuz but she iz way more skratchee. She skratches all the time and she haz to take lots and lots of medisin.

Mummy sez this is jest fer a very short wile cause Rosie iz a dawg wut iz called a Bawstun Terryer and unlike us pit bull dawgs they iz not reel commun in reskue howses and there iz a wating list fer reskue Bawstun Terryers. So Rosie will be gawn soon before she kin take away Mummys hart.

In uther nooz I have jest started takin alerjee shots!

I have so menny alerjees that I must take two shots at a time. But dont wurry it duznt hert.

I wuz a little bit nurvus at furst.

I wuz a little bit nurvus at furst.

Daddy gived me the shot! Mummy wuz too skeered to do it.

Wut you iz dun alreddy?? Well that wuznt so bad.

Dun alreddy?? Well that wuznt so bad!

OK well Mummy sez she haves to go hurry bak to wurk so I gess that is all frum me fer a wile. But dont wurry I will makes Mummy halp me with my blog soon cause it is my burthday very very soon!!

Pee Ess Happy Turkey Day everybuddy!!